The Art of Timing
by dangerdonut
Summary: A series about Amy trusting the fact that her and Karma are soulmates.
1. Chapter 1

_This is a new series I'm working on based on the first episode of season 2. It's going to incorporate certain things from the superteaser, and also from the episodes as the season goes on. It's basically the way I want season 2 to go. I promise you Karmy is endgame. Why else would we be here?_

"It's not your fault you don't feel the same way. Even though, I wish you did." Amy looked at the girl sitting in front of her and felt her heart sink into her chest. She had been in love with Karma for weeks now, but she still wasn't used to the feeling. She looked up at the girl, hoping she might jump in and say she felt the same way. But she didn't. _Maybe she just needs another push_. "You still don't?" Karma remorsefully looked at her before glancing down, remembering how her actions that had gotten them into this situation. "Just checking," Amy smirked. Karma went on about how she was worried Amy would end up hating her while the blonde pulled her in and reassured her. No matter how badly she wanted to, she could never stop loving Karma.

Karma wanted to stay the night, but Amy told her she desperately needed space. Reluctantly, Karma walked home lugging her guitar and holding her arms, wondering if anything could ever be how it used to. Meanwhile, Amy was looking up at her ceiling wondering the same thing. She was fifteen years old. She had known Karma since she was five. Ten years. Two-thirds of her life were inhabited by memories of this girl. Why did it have to be her best friend? She turned over on her stomach and grasped at the covers, shutting her eyes as she cried softly. The sobs grew more intense the more she thought about her situation. There really was no way out. She couldn't banish Karma from her life, not after all they had been through. She also couldn't be around Karma without feeling the unbearable sense of longing in her chest. She just wanted to cry, and she just wanted to hold her, which made her want to cry even more.

Four hours, she had been bawling her eyes out. It was 2 AM and she was losing her mind. She needed someone. She needed Karma. Against all better judgement, she found herself with her phone pressed to her ear. "Amy?" a relieved voice came from the other end. "I'm so glad you called. I can't sleep when we're fighting."

"Karma?" A cracked voice came from the blonde's end. She had started crying again, and hearing the other girl's voice had only made it more intense.

"Amy, what's wrong?" Her voice quickly changed from relief to worry.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I just.. Can you come over?"

"Yes! Yes, I'm walking over right now," Karma said as she sprinted off her bed. "Are you okay? What's happening?"

"I-I don't know," Amy cried. "I'm sorry. I'm really okay, I just can't stop fucking crying. I just need.. someone." She couldn't say "you". Karma knew that's what she meant, but she still couldn't say it. Karma stayed on the line until she reached Amy's house and retrieved the key from under the mat, making her way up to Amy's room. As she approached the door she saw Amy sitting up on her bed, hugging her pillow. As soon as she made eye contact with her, Amy broke down even more. Karma sat down next to her and held her as she cried into her shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Karma. This is the worst," Amy managed to say between sobs.

"Shh, shh. Just calm down. It'll be okay, I promise. Just breathe." Karma felt horrible. The last time she had seen Amy this upset was when her dad left seven years ago. She didn't know what to do then and she didn't know what to do now. All she could do was hold her until she could calm down enough to talk. That moment finally came some twenty minutes later, and Karma was the first to break the silence. "Amy, please tell me what's going on."

"I think you know," she weakly mumbled out, her head still on the other girl's shoulder.

"I feel horrible, Amy. I've never felt this bad in my life, and the worst part is it's not even a fraction of what you're feeling, which makes me feel even worse. I wish I could take your pain away. I wish it was me instead of you," the brunette mumbled sadly.

"I would never want you to feel like this. I don't want you to feel bad at all. I'm not trying to make you feel guilty… I just feel broken. I've never needed someone as badly as I need you right now." It was a toxic situation. Amy knew this was only making Karma feel worse and it wasn't making her feel any better. "You should go," Amy said, pulling back. She kept nodding as if she was trying to convince herself.

"Amy, no. I've put you through so much. Just let me be here for you for tonight, okay? Whatever you want me to do.. just tell me."

Amy forced out a laugh. "Be my girlfriend," she said sarcastically.

The brunette looked down sadly. "Okay, if that's what you want."

"Karma, no," Amy turned serious. "Jesus Christ, no Karma. I'm not going to fucking guilt you into dating me," she turned indignant, as if Karma had just insulted her.

"What about just for tonight?" Karma asked. "Would that help, or maybe give you closure, or something? Would it just confuse you more? Please, Amy, just talk to me. I don't know-" her voice cracked. "I don't know what you want," she choked out in a soft whisper.

"I don't want you to feel like you have to do anything," Amy said, now comforting the girl crying next to her. "This is such a fucking mess. I just don't understand it."

"Don't understand what?"

"How you can kiss me, and want to be around me, and care about me, and not feel the same way I feel about you," she looked into the brunette's eyes. "Like, when we kissed at the threesome, and you said it was hot. Is there something I'm missing here? I just really thought you felt enough to at least give us a chance."

"Amy…"

The blonde suddenly felt a surge of confidence. "And after we kissed at the homecoming assembly, and you said I was great. What does that mean? Do you like kissing me?"

"Amy, I don't know," Karma's eyes were darting all around the room, feeling extremely uncomfortable being confronted about all of this.

"It's because of Liam, isn't it? You have too many feelings for him," the words stung as they left her mouth, mostly because she knew she was right. "You need to be with him right now, don't you?"

"No! No, Amy. It's going to kill you," Karma trembled. "Listen, Amy. I don't know if I can ever feel for you the way you feel for me, and I'm sorry. I'm truly, deeply sorry. But I can control whether or not I date Liam, and there's no way I'll ever put you through that pain."

"No.." Amy started. "Karma, you can't control your feelings for Liam anymore than I can control my feelings for you." She pulled herself away from the other girl. "You should be with Liam."

"No!"

"Can you be honest with me, Karma? I've been honest with you. Do you want to be with him?" The brunette looked around the room with a forlorn expression. "It's okay, Karma. I'll be okay," she managed a smile. "Just tell me. I want you to be happy more than anything."

"Yes," Karma stuttered. "I do."

Although Amy had already known that to be true, it didn't make it hurt any less when Karma confirmed it. Still, it was almost freeing, knowing that this was completely out of her control. She had to hit her breaking point to finally realize there was nothing she could do to make Karma fall in love with her. She was living her truth. She could still be in love with Karma, but she had to let go of the idea of them being together. For now, at least. She would never let go of the idea that they were soulmates, that they would end up together, but she could wrap her mind around the idea of Karma being happy with someone else, even if he was her worst enemy.

"Okay," Amy smiled. "Then you should be with Liam."

"Are you sure?" Karma looked bewildered. Amy had always done everything in her power to make Karma happy, but this was extreme, even for her.

"Of course I'm sure, Karma. All I've ever wanted was for you to be happy. I'll be okay, I promise."

"I just feel so bad, Amy."

"Please don't. I love you, okay? I'm not going to hide my feelings for you, but that's not to make you feel guilty. You don't have to reciprocate, but I'm not going to deny the fact that we belong together. Just not right now. I'm ready, you're not. So what?"

"I don't know if I'll ever be ready."

"That's okay, Karma. I believe in us enough for the both of us. I've never been so sure of anything in my entire life. That's why I'm not worried. I know you think I'm crazy, but we'll get through this. Even if you date Liam. I'm not going to deny you happiness just because I'm hurting right now."

Karma reached out and pulled the other girl into a deep embrace. She loved Amy, she really did, but she wasn't sure she could be in love with her. She didn't know if wanting it was enough. It wasn't that she was opposed to the idea, but there was so much pressure. She couldn't organically fall in love with her under these circumstances. In fact, if Amy hadn't acted so opposed to the "faking being lesbians" thing, Karma might have let herself fall for Amy before she got involved with Liam. It wasn't even that Karma didn't like girls. She had never told Amy this, but she had developed little puppy-love crushes on girls just as much as boys throughout her school years. She didn't think it ever meant anything. She always thought it was more of an admiration, or perhaps jealousy. Lately, she wasn't so sure.

The misfortune of the situation was that Amy hadn't told Karma about her feelings sooner, and now Karma had fallen for Liam. She wasn't sure she loved him yet. She wasn't sure she even knew anything substantial about him, but she had pined away and worked so hard for so long that she couldn't get the idea of being with him out of her head. She wanted to date the hottest boy in school and go to football games and win prom king and queen and act out the high school dream. She finally received Amy's blessing to do this. She should have been happy. _Why wasn't she?_


	2. Chapter 2

Karma woke up early to find that she had fallen asleep next to Amy. Apparently the other girl didn't mind, because she had let her sleep through the night. She glanced over at the sleeping beauty next to her and watched her stir slightly as Karma adjusted her position. She watched her and smiled as Amy gently mumbled something inaudibly under her breathe. Karma couldn't help but notice how adorable she looked, gently clasping the sheets underneath her as she slowly woke up. She blinked a few times before opening her eyes, where hers met a smiling Karma's. "Hi," she couldn't help but smile back as she stretched. Karma stared for a few seconds before answering. "Good morning, sunshine," Karma sang.

"You're gonna have to stop doing that, you know," Amy smirked at the girl next to her, whose face was lying dangerously close to hers.

"Doing what?"

"Being so adorable when you wake up," Amy beamed. "It's really not helping your cause."

"Shut up," Karma rolled her eyes, attempting to ignore how smooth Amy was when she wanted to be. "You have morning breath."

"So do you," Amy winked at her before she rolled out of bed. Karma couldn't help but stare when Amy's nightgown rode up a little too high, exposing her upper thighs. She looked away before Amy noticed. Ever since the threesome, Karma had a newfound appreciation for Amy's body. For someone who she thought rarely worked out, she sure was in good shape. Little did she know that Amy had been going to the gym with Shane for a couple of months now. Partly to get toned to impress Karma, partly to release some of the stress caused by Karma.

"Where ya goin?" Karma asked playfully. "Are you bringing me breakfast in bed?"

"Isn't that your boyfriend's job?" Amy joked. She looked back to see a sad expression on her friend's face. "Karma, I was just kidding. I'm just trying to make things normal again."

"We don't have to talk about him. I mean, it's not a good idea," Karma frowned.

"Okay, well, I definitely won't object to that," Amy smirked.

The two went downstairs to scavenge the fridge. They ate breakfast and talked about things they hadn't talked about in so long. They joked about the kid that sat next to them in Biology, they complained about pizza Friday being taken away in Hester's attempt to be healthy, and they joked about how Oliver had practically been stalking Amy's facebook, liking all of her pictures ever since the protest. It had been a long time since they talked about anything that wasn't so serious. They laughed harder than they had since the whole ordeal started, mostly out of relief that things seemed capable of going back to normal. Lauren stomped down the stairs shortly after. "Would you two shut the fuck up? Is it so much to ask for to get more than five hours of sleep in this house?"

"Calm down, crankypants. We'll stop laughing so loud. I forgot you hate happiness," Amy rolled her eyes as Karma laughed. She admired how easily the blonde had a witty comeback for everything her step-sister said. Karma was more than elated with how the morning was going. She didn't realize how much she _missed_ Amy. It was like a part of her was missing for the past several weeks and it was finally being restored.

"Layla and Lisbeth are staying over tonight. If you two are going to be this annoying the entire time, can you just stay in your room?"

Amy gave Lauren a confused look. "How do you even know Karma's staying over tonight?"

Lauren rolled her eyes. "Good one, Amy," she sneered as she made her way back upstairs to go back to bed.

"Well, I guess you're staying over," Amy smiled.

"Guess I am," Karma beamed.

Karma went home shortly after breakfast to shower and get a change of clothes. Amy felt a sense of contentment when she flipped on the TV and started watching House Hunters. If she and Karma could make it through this, they could make it through anything. Maybe if Karma finally saw that, then she would want to be with Amy just as much as Amy wanted to be with her. The doorbell rang and Amy happily skipped over to answer it, not sure why Karma didn't just barge in like she usually does. She opened the door to meet a very curious looking Shane.

"Oh," Amy said, not being able to hide the disappointment in her voice.

"Wow, nice to see you too," Shane retorted sarcastically as he rolled his eyes.

"Sorry, no! I'm happy to see you. I just thought you were Karma. You know how that goes," Amy stumbled over her words, internally cursing herself for having no filter.

"Well," Shane dragged out the word deviously, "that just so happens to be why I'm here."

"What do you mean?"

"I saw her leaving this morning. Did you let her stay the night, Amy Raudenfeld?"

"Shane, she's my best friend," Amy looked at him pathetically.

"I thought we talked about this, Amy. You're not gonna get over her if you don't put some distance between the two of you."

"What if I don't want to get over her?"

Shane looked down and sighed. "I hate being the one to always have to tell you, but…" he trailed off.

"Just tell me."

"Karma and Liam may have.. shared a moment in the garage yesterday."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure they're back together. So what?"

"So what?! You just said you didn't want to get over her!"

"I don't."

"Okay, back up. You're okay with pining after this girl, letting her walk all over you, all while she's dating someone I'm pretty sure you still hate?"

"I'm.. living my truth."

Shane rolled his eyes. "Alright, Oprah. You do realize sacrificing your own happiness for hers doesn't make you a noble person? It just makes you an idiot." His words came out harsher than he intended, but he was so _frustrated_ with seeing his best friend constantly in pain.

"Whatever," Amy shrugged. "I'm fine with it. What other choice do I have?"

"You can move on!"

"I _can't_," Amy yelled before taking a softer tone. "She's my soulmate."

"I hate to break it to you, but your soulmate is in love with someone you can't stand." Shane was done with stepping on eggshells. He couldn't stand to see Amy like this anymore. He was _this_ close to literally slapping some sense into her. Amy just glanced at him sadly. Amy had always gotten angry so easily, but now he couldn't make her angry when he tried. She just looked broken. "Ugh," Shane groaned, throwing his hands up in the air. "I don't know why I'm always the one responsible for fixing everything, but I promise you this, Raudenfeld. I'm going to find you a girl so deliciously attractive, you won't think of Karma for weeks."

Amy laughed, "good luck with that one, Shane. What makes you so sure she would even be into me?"

It was Shane's turn to laugh. "Have you seen yourself? As soon as your "relationship" with Karma started, girls all over Austin have been waiting for you two to break up. It's a good thing I have connections. You're so lucky you have me, even if you don't appreciate me," Shane smirked. Karma had barged in through the front door just as Shane finished his sentence.

"Why is she lucky? What's going on?" Karma asked curiously.

Shane didn't answer her. He just looked at her, trying to figure her out while Karma stood there uncomfortably. "I just don't get it," Shane finally said, returning his attention to Amy.

"_Shane_," Amy hissed.

"Don't get what?" Karma was getting impatient, she knew they were talking about her.

Shane just rolled his eyes and gave her the "I think you already know" look before he made his way to the door. "I'll be working on what we just talked about," he turned around to wave goodbye to Amy. "You'll thank me later," he winked before he shut the door behind him.

"What the hell was that?" Karma spinned around to meet Amy. "What _doesn't _he get?"

Amy stood there with her mouth agape, trying to figure out what she could say to get her out of this situation. "Something about.. uh. You know what? It's none of your business," Amy suddenly decided. "Do you have a problem with that?"

As much as Karma wanted to exclaim "yes!", she decided that the only reason they would have been talking about her was because of her actions that had gotten them into this situation. "I don't like it when you keep secrets from me," Karma whispered sadly. "I just want us to be honest with each other from now on."

Amy fell onto the living room couch. "It was nothing, Karma. It's stupid. You're just gonna get mad."

"I'm gonna get mad if you don't tell me," Karma pointed out.

Amy quirked an eyebrow at her, as to say "do you really even have the _right_ to get mad?", but she relaxed into her seat as she realized it was best to just be honest with Karma. "Shane thinks I should get over you."

"And?" Karma waited patiently for the answer.

"I told him I'm not ready. I'm not sure if I'll ever be," Amy looked down sadly.

A sense of relief washed over Karma for an unknown reason. She immediately felt selfish that she felt so relieved. Amy had given Karma her blessing to move on, Karma had to give Amy hers. "Amy," she reached out to hold the other girl's arm. "I want you to be happy."

"Well, obviously," Amy said, furrowing her brow, taking Karma aback for a second. "You're not the one having these feelings." She was right, so why _was_ it so hard for Karma to give Amy her blessing? "That wasn't the part that was gonna make you mad, dummy."

"Right, I knew that," Karma forced out a smile before her face dropped again. "Wait, what _was_ the part that was gonna make me mad, then?"

Amy laughed, "it's ridiculous. Shane doesn't know what I see in you. He gets so frustrated with me because apparently there's 'a million other girls in Austin waiting for me' and I'm still hung up on you." Karma didn't laugh. She just looked upset. She felt guilty and attacked at the same time. She always had insecurity issues, she never felt good enough, and Shane was just confirming the fact that she _wasn't_ good enough. "You know that's ridiculous, right Karma? I couldn't even imagine being with anyone besides you. You're my soulmate," Amy said so casually that Karma almost missed it.

"Wait, no. No no no," Karma started while Amy looked at her confused. "Stop saying things like that!"

"Why?"

"You know why."

Amy rolled her eyes. "Okay, I'll just think it then. Jeez. It's not like it's a lie."

"You're making this so _hard_, Amy."

"_I'm_ making it hard?" Amy laughed. "Karma, I already said it's okay if you date Liam. My top priority is your happiness. We're gonna be fine. Just calm down, okay? Can we just watch House Hunters, please?" Amy was so calm about all of this. Sure, she was hurting, but something inside of her told her that everything was going to work out. The more confident she was, the less confident Karma became.

"Okay, yeah. Amy.. I want you to date other people."

"Okay," Amy said as she turned the TV on.

"_Okay?_" Karma asked, remembering how less than two minutes ago Amy had said she wasn't ready to get over Karma.

"Yeah, okay. I'll date other people. We're missing the show, Karma," Amy said gesturing at the TV. Karma sat there completely bewildered by the conversation they just had. This was new territory for her, and she wasn't sure how to handle it. There was one thing for certain, though: she didn't like what was happening one bit.


	3. Chapter 3

The two girls spent the rest of the day watching a Futurama marathon on Netflix. Amy laughed at every joke while Karma barely cracked a smile. The distance between the two was apparent. They usually cuddled up next to each other. If either of them had made the attempt to close the distance, the other one wouldn't have objected, but neither of them wanted to be the one to make that move. After the 7th episode, Amy got up off the couch and stretched. "Jeez, what happened to the day?" she asked while yawning.

"I don't know," Karma said apathetically, not moving from her spot.

"Do you want to go home?" Amy asked, getting irritated.

"What? No! I want to spend time with you."

"It really doesn't seem like it. Come _on_ Karma, you practically begged me to tell you what Shane and I were talking about earlier and now you're acting weird."

"I am not acting weird."

Amy smirked as she came to this realization. "You're acting like you were acting after the threesome."

"What the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?" Karma asked defensively.

"I don't know, Karma. What _does_ it mean?" Amy was getting frustrated. She didn't know if Karma was upset over what Shane had said, or upset over the fact that Amy agreed to move on. She knew Karma wasn't in love with her, but it was still unclear if she had some buried feelings. "You would be honest with me if you had feelings for me, right?" Amy prompted.

Karma rolled her eyes and stood up. "Maybe I should leave."

"Do you understand why I'm frustrated?"

"Yes! Do you understand why _I'm_ frustrated, Amy? I can't do this if you're going to keep bringing it up. It's too hard. I feel _so_ guilty."

Amy immediately felt terrible. "Shit, Karma, I'm sorry. I didn't.. I'm just. I know you don't feel the same way. I need to stop asking. I just thought that maybe you felt, I don't know, _something_?"

Karma knew that things weren't completely platonic between her and Amy, and that's what was driving Amy so crazy. Amy could easily pick up on the fact that Karma was somewhere in limbo between loving her as more than a friend but not being in love with her. She couldn't tell Amy that, though. It would give her too much false hope. She still wanted to be with Liam, she couldn't help it. If she tried to date Amy now, it would end horribly, and she would end up hurting her even worse. "No, Amy. I don't. Okay? I'm telling you right now, so you can stop asking. _I don't_."

It caught Amy off guard. She had practically been asking for it, but it didn't make the words sting any less. She could feel her chin trembling like she was about to tear up, but she stopped it. It needed to be said. "Okay," the blonde crossed her arms and looked down. "I'll stop asking."

There were a few minutes of awkward silence. It was the first time that boundaries needed to be drawn between the two of them. It was new territory, they weren't sure how to handle it. Amy sat back down and turned the TV on, and after watching another half an episode, the air felt less tense. They had been tiptoeing around drawing this line all day, and now that it was finally drawn, Karma felt like she could breathe. Amy quickly recovered as well, realizing it was unfair of her to put her friend in that position. If anything, she was only worsening the odds of them ever being together. She wouldn't hide her feelings for Karma, but she would stop trying to pry Karma's feelings from her.

"I'm sorry," Karma said halfway through the next episode of Futurama. "That was really mean," she scrunched her face, unable to look Amy in the eye.

"It's okay, I need to back off," Amy nodded. "Can we just go back to how it was this morning? I'm just really enjoying spending time with you like we used to," Amy smiled.

"I would _love_ that," Karma smiled back, squeezing Amy's hand.

The two went upstairs to change into something more comfortable. It didn't help that Karma began changing right in front of Amy. She wasn't sure if it was a power play move or if Karma was really just that oblivious. It seemed to be the latter when Karma quickly covered her body with her shirt, stuttering, "I'm sorry. Is this weird?" Amy quickly averted her eyes before stammering, "n-nope. Uh, sorry. I'm, uh, just gonna change in the bathroom." _Was it going to be like this forever? _The thought of that made Amy shutter.

They were always so comfortable in front of each other, there were really no walls between them before now. It was only a year ago that Amy had made her way over to Karma's without giving the other girl fair warning, and made the mistake of excitedly barging into Karma's room without knocking. Screams ensued from both ends, followed by an "Amy, get the _fuck_ out of my room!" Amy quickly swung around and closed the door, collapsing on it in laughter when she realized she had just walked in on Karma taking care of herself.

She felt awful, it must have been traumatizing for Karma, but she could not stop laughing. The fact that she had just caught the girl who plans out _every single move_ in advance _completely_ off guard was absolutely hilarious to her. She sat with her back against the door and her hand over her mouth, attempting to control the laughter, waiting for the inevitable moment she would have to face a very embarrassed Karma on the other side of the door. Three minutes later, Karma swung the door open, causing Amy land on her back looking up at her. She immediately flashed Karma a smile, along with a very amused "hi". Karma rolled her eyes and reached out to help Amy up. Amy hesitated before grabbing on, standing up to hover over the noticeably shorter girl. She pulled back her hand, and the only thing she had to say to the flustered brunette was "I hope you washed your hands."

Now, they couldn't even change in front of each other. It was an unfortunate side effect of falling in love with your best friend. Amy sadly slipped her pajama shorts on before realizing she forgot a shirt. She made her way outside in her bra, because in all fairness, Karma wasn't the one stealing glances at Amy's body - or so Amy thought. "Oh, good," Karma smiled, attempting to hide the fact that she kept looking at Amy's abs. "You don't have a shirt on yet, we can match." Karma tossed over Amy's baby blue shirt riddled with puncture holes. Amy looked up and noticed Karma was wearing a shirt patterned with arrows. "I see what you did there, Ashcroft," Amy smirked before muttering "kinky" under her breath.

"What was that?" Karma asked.

"Nothing," Amy sang before sliding the shirt over her head.

"Whatever, weirdo," Karma teased before gently hitting Amy on the arm. "Let's go watch something that isn't Futurama."

Amy trailed behind Karma as they made their way downstairs, silently wishing that Karma would stop using such sweet smelling perfume. Or at least switch to something that wasn't so _her_. Constantly drowning in her scent was torture. She just wanted to hold Karma tight and breathe her in forever.

Amy supposed it was her scent that made this the hardest. Come to think of it, it didn't help that Karma had been getting more musically talented by the day. It wasn't that Amy was a musical person, just that she found Karma's voice so incredibly _sexy_. Not to mention the adorable smirk Karma develops on her face every time she accomplishes something. _Fuck it_, Amy thought. Everything about Karma was making this hard. Shane was right, there was no way she could get over Karma if she was always around her. But she wasn't quite ready to let go yet. _Just a few more days_, Amy thought. _I'm not going to fall even more in love with her in just a few more days. _

She was wrong.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

For the first time in a while, Amy noticed that Karma didn't have her phone with her. She was relieved. The last thing she wanted was for Liam Booker to be in contact with her. Partially because she hated him with every fiber of her being, partially because she was terrified he was going to spill their secret. She couldn't trust Liam at all. As moral as he acted, he had no internal compass of right and wrong. It was almost as if he was incapable of thinking for himself. He had the idea drilled into his head that he hated lying, and he wouldn't budge. It didn't matter if he would hurt the one person he truly loved. He thought this to be integrity; Amy thought it to be stupidity.

Not only would spilling the secret blow up in Liam's face, it would destroy everything that Amy and Karma had built for the past ten years. It was a drunken mistake, one that should have never happened, so why was it so important for anyone else to know? As long as she and Liam were the only two people that knew, they could pretend like it never happened. Amy still felt horrible, but she would live with the guilt for the sake of Karma's happiness, and only for the sake of Karma's happiness. It wasn't like she was keeping the secret for her own benefit. This is how Amy justified it to herself, anyway, regardless of how truthful it was.

Amy had almost forgotten the drunken events of two nights ago as she sat peacefully next to her friend, resting her head on her shoulder. _Things were gonna be okay_, the tranquil blonde thought as she relaxed into the girl next to her. Amy Raudenfeld must have worked up a good amount of bad karma in her past life, because no more than a few seconds later, her ears were met with a yell from upstairs. "Amy, get in here now," her step-sister screeched as Amy rolled her eyes.

"Why don't you come in here?" Amy yelled back.

"Trust me, Amy. You really don't want that."

Amy's eyes darted open. She immediately knew the fatal mistake she had made. _No_, she thought, _how could I have been so stupid?_ She remembered taking the morning after pill in a dazed hurry yesterday morning. She had carelessly thrown away the box in the bathroom trash. She jumped and ran upstairs, leaving behind a confused Karma.

"Great, I guess you know why you're here," Lauren smirked, judging the panicked expression on Amy's face.

"What do you want, Lauren?" Amy asked weakly.

"It's pretty simple. Don't spill my secret, I won't spill yours. That's it. I'm not an unreasonable person."

Amy looked up at her, noticeably less horrified than before. "Deal," Amy quickly said.

"One more thing," Lauren said as Amy was turning around.

"Fine," Amy reluctantly stopped. "What is it?"

"Layla and Lisbeth have been pestering me nonstop about my.. _pills_. They can tell I'm scared," Lauren looked down, suddenly seeming vulnerable. She quickly returned to her upright posture, not allowing for her guard to be down. "They said they'll let it go on one condition."

"Okay," Amy prompted. "What is it?"

"They know you and Karma will be here tonight."

"And?"

"They 'ship' you guys."

"What does that mean?"

"It means they want to witness Hester's cutest couple doing, I don't know, couple things."

Amy stood there bewildered. "Uh, Lauren, do you not remember our conversation a few nights ago? Trust me, if I could be with Karma, I would."

"I know, I know. But hear me out. We play truth or dare, I dare one of you to kiss the other one, they're happy, you're happy, it's a win win."

"What makes you think I'd be happy about kissing Karma? This is so confusing for me, Lauren. I don't think you get it."

"I don't think you have a choice," she snapped as she stumbled over her words. She tried to look firm, but her eyes looked sorry. It was a mess and she knew it. "Just this one time, okay? Then you never have to kiss her again."

The thought of that seemed considerably more horrifying to Amy. What if this really was her last chance to kiss Karma? At least for a while. She probably would have taken the opportunity even without being blackmailed, but nobody had to know that. She didn't have any other choice but to take this deal. "I'm in," Amy held her arms and looked down. "Just don't tell Karma about any of this."

"I won't. Just make sure my secret doesn't get out," Lauren trembled. "You can leave. They'll be over in a bit."

Amy made her way downstairs and sat back down next to Karma. "What was that about?" Karma asked as she paused her show.

Amy nervously laughed, "it turns out she does want us to hang out with her tonight."

"Why?"

"I don't know, Karma."

"And you said yes?" Amy nodded as Karma grew more confused. "So you invited her to be our third wheel?"

"Not exactly, her friends are still coming over."

"This doesn't make any sense."

"She's going through some stuff right now Karms. I mean, you were in the garage. If something that big got out, wouldn't you want some extra support?" Amy felt confident in her lie. It helped that it wasn't entirely a lie, she really did feel bad for her new sister. Nobody should be outed like that. She didn't think that Lauren had anything to be embarrassed about. Everyone at Hester would be accepting, but she should have been able to tell everyone on her own terms. She honestly just wanted to give her a hug, but that wasn't the kind of relationship they had. If either of them showed any signs of weakness, they were afraid the other one would extort them.

"Since when are you so empathetic?" Karma raised her eyebrow at her friend.

"Yeah, well, I'm actually a pretty great person," Amy said sarcastically. "No wonder all the girls in Austin were so excited when we broke up," she winked at the girl sitting next to her. Karma forced a laugh, but for some reason, she felt uncomfortable. She couldn't sort out why. It could be she just wasn't used to Amy liking girls, or it could be jealousy. She decided to stick with the former because in all honesty, it was easier that way.

"I still can't believe Amy Raudenfeld likes girls," Karma laughed. "I guess I should have seen the signs, with all your food themed clothing and copious amounts of flannel."

"Hey, don't feel bad. It took us both by surprise," Amy grinned as she realized this was the first time she was addressing that she liked girls without referring to Karma.

The other girl reached out and squeezed Amy's hand. "I'm glad you told me."

The doorbell rang before Amy could respond. "I'll get it," Amy yelled loud enough for Lauren to hear. "The fuck?" Amy whispered under her breath as she opened the door and was faced with two very excited girls sporting "#karmy" shirts.

"Hi Amy!" They chimed simultaneously.

"Is Karma here?" Lisbeth asked.

"Uh, yeah, we were just watching a movie," Amy stood uncomfortably.

"Ooh, date night," Layla winked as she and Lisbeth let themselves in and made their way to the living room where Karma was.

"Lauren!" Amy yelled, but there was no response. She desperately wanted to intercept the two girls before they started interrogating Karma with everything "karmy" related, but she had to get to Lauren to ensure this wasn't about to get out of control. She ran upstairs to find her step-sister straightening her hair. "Lauren, what the hell is happening? When did they start making those shirts? Does everyone have one? What is _happening_?" Amy repeated frantically.

"Oh would you relax?" Lauren spun around turning off her straightener. "Vashti handed those out last week after you guys had your stupid make up session on the morning announcements."

"Is everyone in this town mental?!" Amy grasped at her own hair and paced the room. It was hard enough dealing with whatever was going on between her and Karma, she nearly forgot the entire school was in their business.

"Calm down, it'll be fine. We'll just do the truth or dare thing," Lauren tapped at her chin, trying to figure out the next move. "Well, you two already naturally act like lesbians, so we'll be good for the whole night."

"Why do you keep saying that? We don't act like lesbians! This is just how best friends act."

"Would you stop playing dumb? Karma's obviously in love with you, she just needs to go through her 'hot boy' phase. It's fine, Pablo did the same thing," Lauren rolled her eyes as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. "Well, except for him it was his 'hot girl' phase. Now he's dating the devil," Lauren cringed as she remembered her best pal was dating the boy who attempted to out her secret to the entire school.

"Lauren, what are you talking about?"

"You don't think Karma is actually in love with Liam, do you?"

"I don't know," Amy mumbled sadly. The idea of her being in love with him was too much.

"She loves the idea of him, idiot. As crazy as it sounds, sometimes a fantasy can seem more powerful than actual love," she softened her tone when she realized this was new information to Amy. "But that can only last for so long. She thinks he's perfect, but he's not. Eventually she'll realize that Liam can't possibly live up to the expectations she's set for him. Then she'll see what's been in front of her the entire time." Lauren gestured to Amy. "Did you seriously not know this?"

"I guess I never thought of it like that," Amy clenched her stomach at the idea. She wanted to believe Lauren, but she couldn't get her hopes up again. Shane had done a great job at giving Amy false hope, and well, everyone knows how that ended.

"Well, you said it yourself, she doesn't even know anything about him besides the fact that he's the hottest boy in school. Even if she wasn't so obviously gay for you, that relationship would be a disaster." Lauren smiled as she noticed she made Amy laugh.

"You really think she loves me?"

Lauren rolled her eyes. "I _really_ think you need to find a girlfriend that isn't her. She'll get jealous, it'll speed up this thing with Liam."

"I don't want to date someone just to make her jealous," Amy looked down. "I don't want to hurt anyone else."

"Then date someone for yourself, Amy," Lauren crossed her arms. "Karma's not ready. You deserve to be happy until she, well, comes to her senses."

Amy smiled at the girl in front of her. "You know, you can be really helpful when you're not such a bitch."

Lauren couldn't help but smile. "I still have to dare you to kiss her," Lauren raised her eyebrow as Amy's face dropped. "Sorry."

"It's fine," Amy shrugged. "It'll be my last chance for a while."

"I wouldn't do this if I didn't have to."

"I know," Amy smiled. "Come on, let's go downstairs. I'm sure your friends have sufficiently traumatized Karma with all this 'karmy' talk."

"Trust me," Lauren laughed. "They are _not_ my friends."


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Lauren and Amy could feel the discomfort wafting through the air as soon as they approached the living room. Karma sat curled up in the corner of the couch as Layla and Lisbeth hovered over her, bombarding her with questions.

"How long have you and Amy been in love?" Lisbeth asked.

"Is it true you two have been best friends since kindergarten?" Layla chimed in.

"Can we get a picture with you guys?" The excited girls asked simultaneously. Karma darted her eyes between the two of them and opened her mouth, searching for an answer.

"Down, you two," Lauren ordered, as if they were her pets.

"Oh thank god," Karma muttered as Amy and Lauren walk into the room. "When did they hand out the "#karmy" shirts? I thought they weren't coming in until next week."

"Vashti handed them out at school," Amy replied before her eyes darted back to Karma. "Wait, you _knew_ about the shirts?"

"I may have had something to do with their creation," she mumbled.

Amy rolled her eyes. "Yeah, why am I not even surprised," she groaned as she threw her hands up and fell onto the couch next to Karma. The girls all settled in and Layla and Lisbeth went into the kitchen with Lauren.

"Why did you just leave me out here?" Karma angrily whispered, scooting closer to Amy. "It was practically an ambush."

"Don't blame me, you were the one who wanted to be popular," Amy retorted.

"Well, it's weird now, faking our relationship," Karma's face dropped, "now that I know how you feel…"

"Hey, no, we don't have to talk about it," Amy reassured the forlorn girl sitting next to her. "I'm fine. It doesn't bother me. See?" She pointed to her face as she beamed a toothy grin. "Fine."

Karma laughed as she lightly hit Amy's arm with the back of her hand. "You're such a dork."

Amy looked into the other girl's hazel eyes for a few seconds too long. She felt warmth pool in her stomach and a sudden feeling of longing mixed with sadness. Karma was sitting close enough for their arms to be pressed against each other, and she felt overtaken by the scent of her perfume. Amy wouldn't have to lean that far in to kiss her. She wanted to slowly move into the other girl. She wanted to brush their lips together in a whisper before she gently deepened the kiss. She wanted it to be slow. Karma was too precious, too delicate, too _special_ to not experience every single part of her. She had been gazing into her eyes for what seemed like forever. The feeling was both euphoric and agonizing. She wanted nothing more than to kiss her, and she almost did. All she had to do was lean in.

"Amy!" A shrill voice shouted from the kitchen. "Get in here, we're playing a game."

Amy's eyes immediately shot in front of her before she let out an annoyed grunt. "Why can't you come in here?" she yelled back.

"Get your lazy butt in here now!" Lauren's voice grew more irritated.

Karma giggled before looking back at Amy. "Seriously?" the brunette asked. "This is the girl you wanted to spend time with tonight?"

"Yeah, well, I don't really have a choice," Amy grumbled absentmindedly before her eyes widened at the realization of what had just come out of her mouth.

"Wait, why don't you have a choice?" Karma asked, sitting up.

"I, uh," Amy stumbled around for an answer. "My mom wants me and Lauren to get along, um, while she's in Cancun. Yep, I promised her. That's why I'm not grounded anymore," Amy smirked at herself for coming up with such a believable answer.

"I can tell when you're lying," Karma replied. "What does she have on you?"

_Damn_, Amy thought. _The curse of having someone who knows you better than you know yourself. _"Nothing," Amy stated, attempting to sound as believable as possible while Karma gave her a skeptical look. "Nothing, Karma. It's fine, it's nothing. We just have to play her stupid game," Amy said as she trailed off into the kitchen. Karma stayed seated on the couch for a few seconds as she watched Amy walk away. She wondered how she let it get this bad. Amy never kept secrets from her before, but now she was hiding something. She was determined to find out what exactly she was hiding.

Karma joined her a few minutes later in the kitchen to find Amy leaning against the counter staring at the three other girls sitting around the table.

"Great, you're here," Lauren said, gesturing at Karma. "Now we can start. Truth or dare?"

Karma scoffed. "Lauren, what makes you think I would _ever_ play truth or dare with you?"

Lauren laughed as she darted her eyes between her and Amy. "Because Amy wants you to, and last I checked, I'm pretty sure you owe her one."

Karma suddenly felt enraged. She glanced at the blonde who was distraughtly looking at the floor with her arms crossed. Her rage quickly faded into guilt, and she realized whatever Lauren did have on Amy must have been bad, and maybe it was none of Karma's business and Amy had a right to keep it to herself. After all, she had unintentionally made Amy's life torturous for the past several weeks. "Fine," Karma stated. "We'll play your stupid game."

"I knew you'd see it my way," Lauren smirked. The first few rounds were mild. None of the girls asked any crazy questions or made the others perform any exceptional dares. Lauren made sure the setting was just comfortable enough for Karma to let her guard down. Finally, it was Lauren's turn to ask Amy. "Truth or dare?" Lauren subtly nudged her head forward as to say "it's time", and Amy fidgeted in her chair as she played with her hands.

"Dare, I guess."

"Good choice," Lauren winked. "I dare you to kiss your girlfriend."

Layla and Lisbeth clapped and giggled excitedly as Karma's face dropped. "Okay," Amy softly whined as her heart raced.

Karma could see the terror on her best friend's face. "Amy, can I talk to you alone for a second?" she asked as she stood up and Amy followed.

"Why? What's the problem. Isn't she your girlfriend?" Lauren smirked.

"Yeah," Karma deflected. "I just, um, have.. anxiety about kissing in front of other people, I just need a minute," she said as she grabbed Amy by the wrist and took her upstairs.

Amy couldn't help but laugh when they got to her room. "Anxiety kissing in front of other people? Really? Last I checked, that's the only time we kiss."

Karma ignored what the other girl said as she closed the door. "Are you seriously okay with this?"

"What?" Amy asked nonchalantly as she shrugged her shoulders. "It's fine, it's not like we've never kissed before."

"Yeah, but Amy…"

"But what? I'm a big girl, Karma, I can handle it," Amy rolled her eyes.

"I don't think you should let her blackmail you like this."

Amy scoffed, "is the idea of kissing me really that mortifying?"

"No! You _know_ that's not what this is about."

"Really?" Amy snapped. "Then let's go get it over with." She walked out the door before Karma had a chance to respond. She was tired of feeling hurt all the time. She felt like she was about to cry. She knew Karma was only looking out for her, but the fact that she wasn't as willing to kiss her as she was stung. Karma quickly trailed behind her as they made their way back to the kitchen.

They stood across from each other, and Karma stared sympathetically at the broken looking girl in front of her. She really didn't want to kiss Amy like this. She liked kissing Amy, it made her feel safe, but this was too raw, too forced. They slowly leaned into each other, and Karma could sense the despair radiating off of Amy. Their lips nearly missed each other as they met sloppily. Amy quickly corrected her position and pulled Karma's top lip between hers. She desperately tried to ingrain the moment in her memory, fully knowing that this could be the last time she would kiss the love of her life. The kiss wasn't enjoyable for either party, but Amy couldn't pull away. It didn't feel right, but it felt necessary. After a few seconds, Karma finally pulled away. She looked down at the ground. She couldn't look Amy in the eye afterwards. Amy stared at her with tears in her eyes, threatening to drop. After what seemed like forever, they both returned to the table and sat down.

Clearly, Layla and Lisbeth were too in awe of the fact that their favorite couple had just kissed in front of them to notice what a truly awkward kiss it was.

"That was _awesome_," Layla chirped.

"You guys are _so cute_," Lisbeth added.

"Well I'm glad you two idiots are happy," Lauren mumbled, knowing full well they were too excited to hear anything she had said. "Lisbeth. It's your turn."

"Oh, I know! Karma, truth or dare?"

Karma was sitting with her chin on her arms, resting on the table, barely paying attention. "I don't care. Dare. Why not?" She asked apathetically as she buried her face in her arms.

"Kiss Amy. With _tongue_," she giggled uncontrollably as Layla joined her.

"Alright, that's it," Karma thundered. She had enough. Her eyes darted to Lauren as she glared at her. "Lauren, truth or dare?"

"It's not your turn," Lauren laughed and rolled her eyes.

"Truth or dare?" Karma repeated, slower and with anger in her voice.

"Yeah, Karma, I heard you. Still doesn't work like that."

Karma clenched her teeth, trying with everything she had to stay firm and not to tear up. "What do you have on Amy?" she furiously whispered.

"What ever do you mean?" Lauren asked, moving her eyes to Amy.

"What is it? She sure as hell isn't going to tell me. I did your stupid fucking dare, now you tell me the truth. What is it?"

"Wow, you really are a terrible person," Lauren scoffed. "You really want me to tell you what I have on her in front of other people?"

Karma receded into her seat as she realized that there _were_ other people around. "No," she looked down. "But you admit it. You do have something on her?" Lauren just stared at her. "Don't forget I have something on you," Karma sneered through her teeth as she stood up. "I think we're done here." In astonishment, Amy watched her leave as she stormed away. She had never seen Karma _that_ angry before.

"Can I go?" Amy asked Lauren.

"Yeah," Lauren mumbled as Amy stood up, still taken aback by Karma's threat. "Wait, Amy."

"Yeah?" Amy asked, turning around to look at her.

Lauren's face had softened up. She looked at her new sister with sympathy before quickly putting her guard back up. "If she says anything.."

"She won't, Lauren," Amy interrupted. "She won't."

"She better not. Or else," Lauren hissed, attempting to stand firm and hide the fact that she was adequately shaken up.

"Okay," Amy said before turning around and running upstairs. She was eager to confront Karma on what exactly had just happened, but not so eager to talk about the kiss before that. Amy wasn't only disappointed by the kiss, she was disappointed in herself. She wanted the next time she kissed Karma to be heartfelt and romantic. She wanted Karma to feel what she felt when they kissed at the threesome. She wanted Karma to feel what Amy felt every single time she looked at Karma.

What had just happened had been the complete opposite of that. She was worried Karma would never want to kiss her again. To make matters worse, Karma knew Amy was keeping something from her now. She approached her bedroom to see a very frustrated Karma lying sideways, hugging her pillow. She frowned when she was forced to remember how cute she looks when she's angry.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"Hey… you," Amy mumbled awkwardly as she leaned against her doorframe, watching a fuming Karma clutching her pillow. Karma looked at her out of the corner of her eye. "So," the blonde nervously laughed, "what just happened, that was kind of.. weird," Amy fidgeted.

Karma shifted her eyes back to her line of sight. "Shut the door, Amy," she commanded as she curled up into a tighter ball. Amy complied as she sat down next to Karma.

"Are you okay?" Amy asked, concern in her eyes.

"I'm a little pissed off right now," Karma snapped as she looked up at Amy. "If you couldn't tell."

"Can we talk about it?"

Karma immediately sat up and stared intensely at the girl sitting next to her. "I don't know Amy, _can we_? Because I sure want to, but there's something you're not telling me that might make it a little difficult to have this conversation." She scratched at the pillow she was still grasping.

"Wait, you're mad at _me_?" Amy asked. "I thought you were mad at Lauren. You know, the one who just dared me to kiss you, which by the way, contrary to what you might believe, was _not_ fun for me," she furrowed her brow. "It sucked, Karma. You have no idea what it feels like. You're not allowed to be mad at me. I'm allowed to keep some things to myself."

Karma stood up and started pacing the room, attempting to calm herself down. "Trust me, Amy. I'm _pissed_ about that too, and I _will_ find a way to get back at that bitch, but right now I'm more hurt than anything that you feel like you have to keep secrets from me," Karma reasoned. "You didn't tell me you loved me for weeks. I'm not blaming you, it's scary, but damn it Amy, if you keep not telling me things then what does that mean for us? We've been best friends for ten years. We tell each other everything," she sat back down next to Amy, taking her hands in her own. "You mean more to me than anyone else in the world. We're going to spend our lives together-" Amy ripped her hands away from Karma, and it was her turn to stand up.

"Stop it, Karma! You're not allowed to make those speeches either. You're not allowed to make me feel loved and special if you don't _love_ me," Amy batted away the tears that were falling down her face.

"I do love you, Amy," Karma pleaded.

"Just not like that," Amy crossed her arms. "And that's okay. I mean, it's not okay, but it's okay." She shrugged her shoulders. "It is what it is."

"I don't like it," Karma quaked.

"Trust me. Neither do I," Amy groaned. "This is just the way it is, Karma. It can't go back to normal yet. It won't go back to normal for a long time. Maybe even ever." She glanced down to see the girl sitting on her bed looking up at her sadly. "It can't go back to normal when every time I look at you I just want to hold you, and kiss your cheek, and tell you how special you are even if you don't believe it, and remind you how beautiful you are, because I know you forget," Amy uncrossed her arms. "And it can't go back to normal when I just want to kiss you so fucking bad all the time. God, Karma, every day I wonder _why_ it had to be my best friend that I fell for. I lie there, exactly where you are sitting, and I look up at the stupid stars we put up on the ceiling, and I ask why it had to be you," she batted at her tear stained face. "Then I realize how lucky I am that it is you. I'm so _lucky_ that I found new ways to appreciate you. I'm so thankful that I can love _you_ more than anyone else in the universe. I wouldn't want it to be anyone but you, Karma. Even if you don't feel the same way," she shook her head sadly. "That's why it can't go back to normal."

Karma stared up at her with sadness in her eyes as Amy's chin trembled. She stood up and wrapped her arms around Amy's waist, pulling her in and holding her tightly as Amy sobbed. "I don't know what to do, Amy," she squeezed her tighter. "I'm just as lost as you are."

"I know," Amy cried. "I just need some time, Karma," she pulled away. "I'll never stop loving you, but we're just not in the same place right now."

"Amy, what are you saying?" Karma looked into her eyes.

"I think we should give each other some space," Amy nodded, trying to reassure herself.

"No," Karma's chin started trembling. "No, no, no, Amy, no," she started crying. "Please, the only thing I wanted was for you to not pull away, and now you're pulling away."

"We'll be fine, Karma. This isn't forever," she placed her hand on her shoulder. "We'll still be in each other's lives, just not to this extent right now."

"Yeah, that's how it starts off. Then we grow apart. Then we just stop talking all together," Karma's crying grew nearly hysterical. "Amy, please, I'll do anything. I won't date Liam. I don't know if I can feel the same way as you, but I can try."

"No, Karma," Amy stood firmly. "You need to live your life right now and I need to live mine. We'll find our way back to each other, we always do. We'll still be friends. We'll still hang out. We just can't spend every moment together. I can't tell you everything that's going on in my life and I can't bear to hear about everything that's going on in yours. It's too hard."

Karma wrapped her arms around Amy and held her tightly again as she sobbed into her shoulder. "I don't want to lose you," she bawled. "Nobody is as important to me as you are."

"Trust me Karma," Amy pressed her cheek against the side of Karma's face. "I feel the same way."

"Can I stay here for tonight?" Karma begged. "One last night?"

"Karma…"

"Please," she asked as she pulled away from Amy and looked into her eyes.

"Yeah," Amy said, taking in the girl in front of her. She was never able to resist giving into what Karma wanted. "Of course."

"Thank you," Karma said as she wiped the tears away from her eyes. She climbed under the covers and Amy quickly followed. Karma closed the distance between them as she wrapped her arm around Amy's waist and rested her head on her shoulder. "I think I'm gonna miss this the most," she whispered.

"Me too," Amy agreed, leaning over to kiss Karma's forehead.

"We'll get back to good, Amy," Karma said as she relaxed, regaining control of her composure. "I promise. This means too much to me."

"Okay," Amy spoke.

"I mean it," Karma said, more firmly this time. She lied there for a few more minutes, just holding the girl next to her. "I already miss you," she whispered sleepily as she turned her face into the crook of Amy's neck before letting sleep take over.

Amy let the silence engulf her. She was convinced now more than ever that she and Karma belonged together. She was sure that Karma loved her as more than a friend, whether or not she realized it yet. She remembered what Lauren had said earlier about Karma not being ready. Amy's feelings had hit her like the express train, but Karma's were taking the late bus. Karma didn't have the same luxury as Amy of being sure about her feelings. She needed time and experience to find out what she didn't want before she could find out what she did want. It could take a long time. They would both date other people, but Amy was certain she would never love anyone like she loved the girl sleeping next to her, holding onto her and breathing softly into her neck. She would wait for Karma. She would wait forever if she had to.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"You _have_ to move on," Shane's disgruntled voice interrupted, resonating far too close to the weary blonde's ear. Amy had started to explain the previous night's events, including the disastrous kiss and the outburst of one-sided feelings.

"Would you let me finish?" Amy rolled her eyes. She looked down at the ground as she crossed her arms, remembering how rough this morning had been. She woke up to her alarm and the girl she loved more than life holding onto her, neither of them willing to let go. It took Lauren screaming _will one of you turn off that fucking alarm_ from the room next door to make Amy let go. She hit her alarm and climbed out of bed, the tired girl next to her looking up at her sadly, knowing this was the last time they would sleep in the same bed for a while.

They took their time getting ready, neither one of them willing to accept the fact that once they arrived at school, they would be making a concerted effort to spend less time with each other. Once they finally dragged themselves to the bus, they agreed it would be okay to sit next to each other. _No need to get ridiculous with these rules_, Amy thought. It proved to be a problem when Karma's leg kept brushing up against Amy's, and the blonde had to do everything in her power to not rest her head on Karma's shoulder. It didn't help that Karma kept glancing over with sadness in her eyes, wanting nothing more than to have her best friend back.

Once the bus ride was over, Amy was equal parts relieved and disappointed. Karma asked her if she wanted to do homework in the quad until school started, but Amy reminded her that spending every moment together defeated the purpose of giving each other space. Amy told her she was going to go find Shane, and Karma pulled her into a tight hug before she left. "Sorry, I just know I won't get to do that for a while," Karma groaned. Amy watched her as she walked away, wondering how Karma could love her _that_ much and still not want to be with her. She was glad in her decision to take some time for herself. Everything had become far too painful and confusing. It would take some getting used to, however. She had been away from Karma for all of twenty minutes but she still missed her with every bone in her body.

"I told her I needed some space," Amy finally responded.

"_Finally_," Shane threw his arms up. "So you told her to go home after your emotional word diarrhea?"

"Not exactly," Amy clenched her teeth. "We kind of fell asleep together."

"You slept in the same bed? Seriously?" Shane looked at her in disbelief. "Even after everything you said to her, she still felt comfortable with that?"

"She kind of insisted."

"But you told her you needed space!" Shane looked equal parts irritated and confused. "Did you at least build a barrier with pillows, or something?"

"Shane, come on, we're not five," Amy furrowed her brow.

"You cuddled, didn't you?"

"Maybe a little?" Amy mumbled, bracing herself for Shane's response.

"Oh my god, Amy," Shane had to stop himself from shaking her. "That's _weird_."

"No it's not," Amy crossed her arms tighter. "You wouldn't understand. We used to do that all the time anyways. It's a girl thing."

Shane laughed out of frustration. "No, Amy, it's a you and Karma thing. And you need to stop doing that. All of that," he threw his arms up again. "You're basically giving her all the perks of being in a relationship with you while she's off fucking Liam!"

"That's being a little ridiculous," Amy clenched her stomach at the thought of Karma giving a part of herself to Liam that Amy wanted desperately. "Besides, not that it's any of your business, but I _am_ done with 'all of that'," she threw her arms up mimicking Shane. "For now, anyways."

"Good! Be done, show her what she's missing," a smirk creeped up on Shane's face. "Don't worry, I'll find you the hottest lesbian in the city of Austin."

"I don't know if I'm ready to date yet," Amy rubbed her neck. "I don't think I could really connect with someone right now."

"See, this is your problem," Shane rolled his eyes. "Come on, it's not like you're trying to get married. You just need to have some fun," he nudged Amy while a devious smile crept onto his face. "And I know the perfect opportunity."

With everything going wrong in Amy's life, she desperately needed a distraction. Not to mention, being around a very touchy Karma nonstop for the past few days came with the side effect of almost unbearable sexual frustration. She stared at the ground in consideration for a few seconds before looking back at her friend. "I'm listening."

Shane's smile grew bigger. "In less than three hours, there's a busload of Refugees from our sister school in Brazil coming in. I don't know if you follow Hester's Tumblr, but let me tell you, there are some girls from that school that will make you forget about Karma real fast."

Amy forced out a laugh. "How do you even know any of them are gay?"

"Stop questioning me," Shane whined. "How many times do I have to tell you I have my sources? God, you're so lucky you have me," he put his arm around her shoulder and began walking towards her first class.

"You keep saying that, but I have yet to see the benefits," Amy teased.

"You'll thank me later."

Because Amy naturally assumed a circumstance would never arise where she would need space from her best friend of ten years, at the beginning of the year, she coordinated her schedule to nearly match Karma's. In addition, the girls were lab partners in their first period Chemistry class. Amy walked into her class as the bell rang, taking a seat next to Karma. She figured it would be okay to still talk to Karma during school, but she couldn't find the words to say. Apparently, neither could Karma. They sat awkwardly next to each other while the teacher went over ionic bonds.

More than anything, Amy just wanted to make Karma laugh. She wanted to break the tension between them, try to at least get back to some level of normalcy in their friendship. She smiled to herself as she thought of a joke. _Hey Karma, it's a shame you won't date me, we really have _chemistry _together_. She frowned when she realized a cheesy pickup line probably wasn't the best idea under these circumstances. She would save that one for when her and Karma inevitably started dating.

That was another thing she would do to pass the time. She would imagine all the things that were weird now that she and Karma would laugh about when they ended up together. Amy never even considered a scenario where her and Karma didn't spend the rest of their lives together, and she was beginning to wonder if that was part of the problem. It was kind of hard to move on when she kept imagining her life together with the girl sitting next to her, nervously avoiding eye contact and tapping her pencil on the table. She buried her head in her arms, exhausted from pining after what seemed to be less and less probable with each passing day.

Comparatively, Karma wasn't doing so well either. She had to physically stop herself from looking at Amy the entire class. She desperately wanted to talk to her, but she figured that this was part of Amy's plan to distance herself from Karma. She decided she needed to respect that, figuring that it was her own stupid plan that got her in this situation in the first place. That didn't make it any easier, though. Even though Amy had given Karma her blessing to date Liam, she decided it would be too hard on Amy to see the girl she's in love with date her worst enemy. That didn't stop her from missing him, however. She wasn't even sure if they were still together. She always felt so in control when she was with Liam, like she was powerful enough to convince him to love her.

Before Amy confessed her feelings, Liam was the only person she let herself consider being with. She was so sure that her kiss with Amy at the threesome was a fluke, but the more distanced Amy got, the less Karma could stop thinking about kissing her again. She chalked it up to a "you always want what you can't have" scenerio, and told herself to stop being so selfish. _You'll only confuse her more if you tell her_, Karma thought. _You don't know what you want and it will destroy her if you're wrong_. Besides, Amy would wait for her. She was confident that she had a very long time before Amy would move on, if ever.

The two girls managed to go the entire morning without saying a word to each other. It was extremely unpleasant for the both of them, and neither one thought they could ever get used to it. Karma decided to skip getting food and headed straight to the art room to hide from the girl she wanted to talk to more than anything. She was relieved to find that Liam wasn't there. She just wanted to be alone.

She looked around the room to find a sculpture sitting in the back corner. She walked over to get a better look, discovering it was a giant heart with numerous nails hammered into it. She rolled her eyes before muttering, "this has Liam written all over it." She turned it over to find his name sketched onto the bottom, smirking at the fact that Liam created the most predictable art in the entire school. She frowned when she realized that she was the one that caused him to make this overly cliche sculpture. She frowned even more when she realized she had done the same thing to Amy, the person she cared about more than anyone, only worse. "I really fucked up," she whispered before sliding down the wall to sit down and spend the remaining thirty minutes in self-loathing silence.

Meanwhile, Amy was moving towards the quad to finally get some space away from the girl who clouded every aspect of her mind. "Amy Amy Amy Amy!" an excited voice from behind her made her turn around. She looked back to see Shane running towards her, almost knocking a few people down on his way. "Come with me," he demanded, out of breath. "I have someone I'd like you to meet."

"Already?" Amy furrowed her brow. "Didn't the Brazilians just get here, like, fifteen minutes ago?"

"What can I say? I work fast. Come on," he pulled her wrist as she trailed behind him.

He led her to the lunchroom and pointed to a table with a confused girl sitting alone. "What do you think?" he asked.

"Wow, super cute," Amy said, surprised.

"Uh, cute, Amy? She's hot. Let's go say hi," he winked before pulling her to the table.

The girl looked up when she saw the two sitting down across from her. "What's going on?" she asked. Shane just smiled at her excitedly. The girl turned to Amy, "your friend told me to wait here and I'm not really sure why," she laughed. Amy's heart rate picked up when she looked into the girl's piercing blue eyes. Her thick brown hair laid over her tank top that showed off her slender figure and incredibly toned arms. Suddenly, Amy felt nervous.

"Yeah," she nervously laughed. "Shane does a lot of confusing things."

"I'll leave you two alone," Shane smiled and nudged Amy.

The girl looked at Amy, even more confused than before before shrugging it off. "Fabiana," she said, before reaching her hand out to shake Amy's.

"I'm Amy," she smiled, realizing how sweaty her palms were one second too late as she took the girl's other hand to shake it. "Sorry," she apologized. "It's just, uh, really hot in here today."

Fabiana laughed. "It's fine, don't worry about it."

Amy smiled her famous nervous grin before fidgeting with her hands. "So, are you gay?" she blurted out without thinking before immediately closing her eyes and internally cursing herself. Luckily, the other girl just laughed before saying, "oh, so that's what this is."

Amy rubbed the back of her own neck. "Shit, I'm sorry, I'm going to kill Shane. He said you were-"

"No, I mean, I am. Well, mostly," she smiled back at Amy.

Amy let out a sigh of relief. "I'm sorry, I'm a mess right now."

"You don't have to keep apologizing," Fabiana giggled. "You're cute."

Amy's eyebrows shot up. "I am?"

"Yeah, you are," she smiled, amused at Amy's nervousness. "Come with me to the school fair tonight? I'd like to get to know you better."

"There's a school fair tonight?" Amy asked, darting her eyes back and forth attempting to remember.

"Yes?" Fabiana laughed. "Do you even go here?"

"Yeah, I just, my… friend, usually pays attention to school activities, and well, we're not really talking right now."

"Oh, I'm sorry," she stared at Amy sympathetically, noticing the pain in her voice at the last sentence.

"It's fine," Amy smiled, suddenly feeling more confident. "I don't want to think about that anymore. Count me in for the fair," she smiled as the bell rang.

"Sounds good. It's a date," Fabiana beamed at her as she stood up, turning around to go to her new classes. Amy smiled to herself her entire walk to class. She finally felt desirable. After all the rejection she was facing, it was a relief to know that someone she actually found interesting wanted to get to know her. For the first time in weeks, Amy was thinking about something that wasn't Karma.

A/N: I know it looks bleak for karmy right now, but they both have some stuff to work out before anything happens between them. Don't worry, though, I have something good planned out for the next chapter ;)


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